Author Topic: Help! I just don't know what to say . . .  (Read 21874 times)

Offline his.silly.wife

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Re: Help! I just don't know what to say . . .
« Reply #30 on: December 20, 2006, 12:45:13 PM »
Hi KristenA,
I don't know what to say for this either, so I am bumping your question.

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Offline healthyinOhio

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Re: Help! I just don't know what to say . . .
« Reply #31 on: December 20, 2006, 03:02:25 PM »


Also, I'm not sure when (if ever) it is tactful to suggest nutriotinal/herbal/remedies. I don't want to put them off by basically saying that 90% of what their doc is saying I don't agree with.  :-\.
 

I am glad that you asked this, Kristen. I am facing this myself.  My mother has been told that she has a lump in her breast.  She is a little open to alternative therapies, but only after she has seen it work in us for FOUR years.  So, how do you try to convince someone(if they do have cancer) not to go the "chemical" route?  Do you even recommend stuff, or just wait for them to ask.

Offline carolinachic

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Re: Help! I just don't know what to say . . .
« Reply #32 on: December 20, 2006, 03:59:31 PM »
I had a friend a few years ago, die from cancer. It was really sad, she left two young children behind. She was willing to try anything after being told she was terminal, the problem was that she would have to sign release forms from the doctor, thereby cutting off her patient relationship with him. There would be no further advice from himl, drugs, or anything medical as far as this doctor. I had referred her to a natural doctor who I knew had a great success rate in healing cancer patients. Her fear of losing her doctor whom she had put so much confidence in, kept her from going to a natural alternative. Even though her doctor had told her there was nothing else he could do, except to keep her drugged. I really didn't understand since they told her she was terminal why she wouldn't try another route, but I think she was afraid to let go.  :-[ She died a year later.  She was very appreciative however, of all the information I had given her, because she knew I did it because I really cared for her, and she did at one point at least call the natural doctor.
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Offline SC

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Re: Help! I just don't know what to say . . .
« Reply #33 on: December 20, 2006, 04:18:40 PM »
When it comes to natural remedies for people you know who are suffering, why not use Welltellme? If they have access to a computer, all they need is this site's address. They could search the topics and get all sorts of information. Or, if they don't have a computer, you could offer to print off topics for them (Stock up on paper first!). In this way, you aren't pressuring them to choose your way or risk offending you (their friend) by deciding another way. WellTellMe is a way to get information to people in a non-threatening way. Whether it's depression or cancer, I would think that WTM is a great place to point people who are searching for answers -- or at least better questions.
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Offline pelican

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Re: Help! I just don't know what to say . . .
« Reply #34 on: December 20, 2006, 05:29:04 PM »
My dad has just started his second round of chemo.  I've asked him if he's aware of alternative cancer treatments and have printed off alot of information from the internet which  he has read.  Back when I was at home yet,  I remember us watching a video that had the testimony of the pastor who started Halleluyah Acres.  So he knows of it but I think the bottom line is that he is just downright scared.  He can't quite feel that alternative care is trustworthy or proven.  Personally, I think the medical profession can make me question just as much. I do make mention of new things I've heard and ask if he "eats this or takes this" because I've heard that it is beneficial for cancer patients.  He knows that I care and  I am careful  to not be pushy.  I know that if I was in his shoes I wouldn't care for everybody telling me their opinion and trying to convince me of what they believe.  But I would welcome any alternative care info about treatments that are not widely known.

Offline Simply Kristen

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Re: Help! I just don't know what to say . . .
« Reply #35 on: December 20, 2006, 07:18:30 PM »
I want to re-ask my question:

What is the right way to respond when a friend (who does not appear to be depressed) begins talking about their struggles with depression and/or ADD.

If my opinion is requested I know what to do.
However, I don't know the correct response when it is mentioned (regularly) in conversations.
I know there is not ONE CORRECT response.....but a few helpful tips would be appreciated.  ;D

Offline SC

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Re: Help! I just don't know what to say . . .
« Reply #36 on: December 21, 2006, 04:06:19 AM »
I want to re-ask my question:

What is the right way to respond when a friend (who does not appear to be depressed) begins talking about their struggles with depression and/or ADD.

If my opinion is requested I know what to do.
However, I don't know the correct response when it is mentioned (regularly) in conversations.
I know there is not ONE CORRECT response.....but a few helpful tips would be appreciated.  ;D

My questions would be something along the lines of, "Are you pleased with the progress you are making?" and/or "Do the doctors think you'll ever be able to function without treatment/medication?" Show an interest in their current condition and listen to their answers. If a desire to be healthy apart from medication is expressed, I refer them to WTM.

Bottom line, I find out what their goals/hopes/desires are regarding their condition and go from there. Some people are perfectly satisfied with regular doctor visits and Rx. It gives them a conversation starter. If this is the case, just understand that this is where that person is.

Continue to live for Jesus and love him/her. Eventually, their desire for something better may increase. THEN (only then) you'll have an opportunity to discuss alternatives.

And, if the urge to express an opinion becomes overwhelming . . . there's always WTM!  ;D
I'm no doctor . . .             I'm not even a Post hole Digger! ;)
See what works for me at LexingtonSlim.com