Author Topic: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?  (Read 7372 times)

Offline starryiz

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I had my 2nd baby 3.5 months ago.  After her birth I had several episodes of just crying for no reason, feeling terribly down, and picking fights with my DH just for no reason at all.  Now at 3.5 months post-partum, I'm still struggling with feeling low in general, feeling inadequate as a mother and wife, and totally disliking my post-baby body this time around.  I have a history of eating disorders and depression in my past.  Luckily, I am smart enough to not go back to my old disordered habits, but I still am plagued with all the thoughts and emotions of it.  I just want to be happy, have good days, and love my family and enjoy them.  But I just cant seem to.  I dont know if this is real, or just me not trying hard enough.  I cant talk to my DH about this...he doesnt believe that depression is real and thinks it is all in people's heads and made up.  And I dont want to be taking medications either.  I want to try something naturally to help myself.  And I never felt this way after having my first baby.  I never got weepy or felt down after him.  But I had more time for myself then...I could take walks etc to relax and right now with the cold and 2 little ones, I just cant get it in.

Does this sound like PPD?  And what can I do to help besides seeing a doctor or therapist wich is out of the question with my DH.

Offline littlemama24

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #1 on: January 04, 2008, 08:00:38 AM »
It does sound a bit like PPD.  What are you taking supplement wise?  You could also just be over-tiredand, emotionally drained, and hormonally stressed.  Don't be too hard on yourself.  Those are NOT excuses for behaving badly towards your role as a mom and wife but they are reasons to give yourself some slack.  Try to simplify your day down to what dh wants done and not much else.  Also, try to put your energy into doing little things to make him smile and you'll find yourself joining in.  If you aren't taking any spirulina I would recommend starting that and make sure you get plenty of your B vitamins.  Also, get enough sleep and some sunlight on ya! ;) hth

Offline mhsmama4

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #2 on: January 04, 2008, 08:06:40 AM »
Yes, it sounds like PPD to me, having been through it before.  Sunlight and extra cod liver oil may help, as well as regular exercise, but if they don't, please seek professional help.

Offline ShabbyChic

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #3 on: January 04, 2008, 08:14:27 AM »
Well let me begin by saying I can relate 100% to what you are going through.  I also suffered from an eating disorder for 10 years and depression.  I've been counseled, and I've also studied counseling at the graduate level, and I believe that happiness is a choice.  

That being said, I do believe that it is no coincidence that my father, uncle, grandmother, and many of my uncles and cousins have also suffered from depression at some point.  Whether or not it is a spiritual strong hold, a bad habit, or a physiological issue (or in my opinion, a combination) we've all learned to adjust our thought lives, for "as a man thinks, so he is."  (Proverbs 23:7)  And some of us have taken prescription medications for periods of time in order to get over the hump.

However, there is a 100% legitimately documented and well known shift in hormones post partum, and it affects women differently.  You need help.  You may need more sleep, exercise, help from a friend to do a few loads of laundry or take you out for a cup of coffee once a week.  Or you may legitimately need prescription medication for a few months until you are physiologically able to regain perspective.

In my opinion you need an older woman in whom you can confide who is able to guide you and refer you to a professional counselor if need be.  She needs to fill your husband in on everything, and you and he need to be on the same page.  I begin EVERY DAY by counting my blessings, by thanking G-d for what I can see that I do have.  And it helps me.

You are not alone.  There is help, and there is support, and there is hope.  You can do this.  This is not a reflection of your inablity to do something, or a deficiency; this is completely normal and you should not do this alone.  

I am praying for you.  I really mean that, and you're welcome to PM me.  Blessings abundant.
« Last Edit: January 04, 2008, 08:17:20 AM by ShabbyChic »
That's Shabby SHEIK not Shabby CHICK.  Hee-hee.

Offline floydian

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #4 on: January 04, 2008, 10:13:16 AM »
I never had ppd to an extreme, but I sure have experienced the blue's after I had several children. 

There's a link on here somewhere, if I had more time, I'd find it for you, but quickly, the thing that helped me the most was EPO (evening primrose oil).  With my last little one, I began taking it a few weeks before our last son was born.  This was the first time I did not experience the baby blues.

I have also had great success with it since I started my periods back.  I begin taking it about a week and a half before I think I'm supposed to start, and have much less moodiness.

I can't say enough good things about this supplement. ;D ;D ;D
And as He stands in victory,
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me;
For I am His and He is mine—
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.

Offline happyhomemaker

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #5 on: January 04, 2008, 04:48:20 PM »
It does sound like PPD to me too.  I had this really badly with my 1st, and making it through the first 3 months was a trick.  Something I did learn though, for me taking Expecta (sold in the vitamin section at Walmart) is very valuablel. I took it during the pregnancy with my 2nd, and then after he was born.  It made a WONDERFUL difference, and when I missed a day taking it EVERYONE could tell. I'm now taking this with #3, and will untill such a time as I feel I am over the birth etc.  This is not a medicine, but a DHA supplement.  It has omega 3 (non fish) fatty acids in it. Seems funny that something so simple could work............. but ask my family!! :)  Hope you get what you need. Having been there, done that...I understand right where you are.  Hang in there!  It does get better!! :D  Feel free to PM me if you have more questions about the Expecta.
Happyhomemaker :)

Offline marksgirl

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #6 on: January 04, 2008, 07:09:24 PM »
To me, this also sounds like PPD, though I don't have any other helpful advice to offer other than what has already been shared.

I never experienced PPD with my first four children, so when I started feeling weepy and stressed with my fifth, I just didn't know what to do.  I would be at my mom's house next door, feeling fine, and it would be time to take the children home for bed, and I'd panic.  I never said anything, though; I just couldn't.  It was like I was afraid to be alone with them.  I never felt like hurting them or myself, so it wasn't a danger issue.  I just felt overwhelmed.

I don't really remember how long it lasted, possibly 3+ months?  Before #6 was born, I had discussed what I needed: to not be alone!  (my husband worked swing shift, so I'm sure that played a part of it)  Things went much better next time around (and with #7 as well) but I will always remember how I felt, and I won't hesitate to holler for help if it happens again!

Offline Mrs. Davis

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #7 on: January 05, 2008, 05:24:17 AM »
I have also gone through this.  I think you have already taken a big step in the right direction just because you see what is happening and acknowledge it.  You have looked for support here and found others who agree that they have been in this, too.  Just knowing you are not alone is a big thing!  When I struggled with this, the feeling of being alone was the worst! 

Please know that you can pm me any time if you just need to let off steam or just need someone to talk to.  The worst thing to do it keep it all inside. 

Vicki

Offline floydian

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #8 on: January 05, 2008, 07:59:33 AM »
I have also gone through this.  I think you have already taken a big step in the right direction just because you see what is happening and acknowledge it.  You have looked for support here and found others who agree that they have been in this, too.  Just knowing you are not alone is a big thing!  When I struggled with this, the feeling of being alone was the worst! 

Please know that you can pm me any time if you just need to let off steam or just need someone to talk to.  The worst thing to do it keep it all inside. 

Vicki


Ditto!  I seem to ditto you a lot. :D

Anyhoo, I remember with one of our early ones that my dh did not like the baby at all.  It was all my perception.  It was totally off the wall, but I couldn't see past my emotions which were all messed up.  I also remember with another baby beginning to feel like that and realizing the feelings WERE my perception and was able to realize that I was being weird.

I don't know if this will help anyone, but it sure helped me to realize with a later child what was going on.
And as He stands in victory,
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me;
For I am His and He is mine—
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.

Offline Rikki

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #9 on: January 05, 2008, 02:34:10 PM »
This was exactly what happened to me after my 2nd. And I have NEVER been depressed or even close to being depressed before this. It actually freaked my husband out because he had never seen me that way. He would come home from work early on several occasions just to be with me, and try to cheer me up. I had read Created to be His Help Meet a couple of years before, but I read it again during this depression and it really seemed to be what pulled me out of it. I slowly tried to do the things in the book and the more changes I made the better I felt! It was amazing! We also took walks together every night as a family and that helped a lot as well. It gave my dh and I a chance to talk about our days and it was wonderful. If you want a copy of Created then PM me, or if you just want to talk!!
I pray this passes quickly!!

Offline Amy G.

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #10 on: January 06, 2008, 05:31:06 AM »
I am right there with you.  But this happened with my first child.  My mom came and saw us in the hospital and I would not even holder her for very long.  My mom new that I was depressed. This went on until she was about 5 months old.  Then one day when we were coming back from my mom and dads i broke down and started crying and I did not know why.  Then my dh told me that it was time to get help. I ended up that it was PPD.  I had to take meds to help me. But for the longest time some of them threw out the past 8 years have just made my moods to be one mood.  But I do know that when i got on the right one it has really helped.  But I do know what you mean not wanting to be on medicine.  I do know that it helped me to talk to my dh about it.  Along with I was able to talk to a lady at church which was really helpful. 
God bless all that are going threw PPD or anything like it.
Amy G.
I bare you on eagles wings, and brought you unto myself. Exodus 19:4 
In memory of Christian the son I never got to hold,

Offline hollyolly123

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #11 on: February 12, 2008, 03:38:01 PM »
My baby is 11 days old, and I was starting to feel really great, over did it one morning, and started bleeding really bad.  I don't know if this is the reason I feel so bad, but I'm having ppd symptoms (sometimes more like post partum rage  :'() and I can't exercise because I have to lie around all the time.  The kids are unhappy because daddy is overwhealmed (and deploying in two weeks) and I'm afraid of what's going to happen next.  My house is a mess.  All I can do in the afternoon and evening is get mad (and try really hard to fight it) and cry when I succeed at not being mad.  Most stuff it's like there's no reason for me to be mad at all.  I feel like I desperately need exercize and I so badly want to do some housework but I can't. 

If anyone knows of any more supplememts or tips I'd sure appreciate it.  I'm using Natural Calm magnesium and I'm going to start EPO as soon as I'm done typing.  Thanks all.

Offline healthybratt

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #12 on: February 12, 2008, 03:45:54 PM »
My baby is 11 days old, and I was starting to feel really great, over did it one morning, and started bleeding really bad.  I don't know if this is the reason I feel so bad, but I'm having ppd symptoms (sometimes more like post partum rage  :'() and I can't exercise because I have to lie around all the time.  The kids are unhappy because daddy is overwhealmed (and deploying in two weeks) and I'm afraid of what's going to happen next.  My house is a mess.  All I can do in the afternoon and evening is get mad (and try really hard to fight it) and cry when I succeed at not being mad.  Most stuff it's like there's no reason for me to be mad at all.  I feel like I desperately need exercize and I so badly want to do some housework but I can't. 

If anyone knows of any more supplememts or tips I'd sure appreciate it.  I'm using Natural Calm magnesium and I'm going to start EPO as soon as I'm done typing.  Thanks all.
Cod Liver Oil is a quick easy a great supplement for depression of all types.  Probably a good idea to take this with your EPO as EPO is an omega 6 and you need some 3s to balance it out.

This thread talks about fatty acids and how to balance them.

Inflammation & Diet [Recommended Dosages & Diet]

  My favorite herb book!!

Offline floydian

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #13 on: February 12, 2008, 04:32:30 PM »
My baby is 11 days old, and I was starting to feel really great, over did it one morning, and started bleeding really bad.  I don't know if this is the reason I feel so bad, but I'm having ppd symptoms (sometimes more like post partum rage  :'() and I can't exercise because I have to lie around all the time.  The kids are unhappy because daddy is overwhealmed (and deploying in two weeks) and I'm afraid of what's going to happen next.  My house is a mess.  All I can do in the afternoon and evening is get mad (and try really hard to fight it) and cry when I succeed at not being mad.  Most stuff it's like there's no reason for me to be mad at all.  I feel like I desperately need exercize and I so badly want to do some housework but I can't. 

If anyone knows of any more supplememts or tips I'd sure appreciate it.  I'm using Natural Calm magnesium and I'm going to start EPO as soon as I'm done typing.  Thanks all.

Well sweetie, you do have a ton on you right now.  Not one lady I know likes their house to be a mess.  You've just had a baby.  You have other children and your husband is leaving in two weeks. 

Any one of the above said things are a lot in and of themselves, put them together and you've got enough to bring down superwoman.  Bless your heart.  I know it's so tough on you right now.  I can't even begin to imagine the stress you are under right now.

Do you have anyone around you that can help you out?
Can you call a friend from church and tell her you are about to pull out your eyebrows by the roots and ask if she can help?  If you were closer and you called me, I'd be there in less than 30 minutes.  I'd be hurt if you were going through all that and you didn't call me.

Sometimes my husband really likes to help me.  He likes to know that he's relieved my burden once in awhile.  Can you ask him if he would mind doing the dishes.  Sometimes, just that much can make you feel so much better. 

Just have a really, really good cry.  It's good for you.  It relieves stress.

Walk outside for just a few minutes and breathe deeply--even if it's cold.  It's just nice to be outside just a minute.

Take a bath.  Close the door and read a fun story.  Kids books are great for this.  I enjoy Anne of Green Gables series.  Light fun clean reading.  Get lost in a book for an hour constantly turning on the hot water again with your toes.

Supplements are great.  I am very grateful for Natural Calm and EPO don't get me wrong.  I have suggested them many a time on here.  But you are going through a tough time right now.  Emotions are a natural way for us to deal with stress.

Also, don't forget to post on the prayer thread if you haven't already.  There are a few hundred ladies here who would love to pray for you. ;)

Much love and a hug sent your way, sweetheart. :-*

Floydian

« Last Edit: February 13, 2008, 05:02:20 AM by floydian »
And as He stands in victory,
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me;
For I am His and He is mine—
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.

Offline hollyolly123

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #14 on: February 12, 2008, 05:24:13 PM »
Thanks so much, Floydian.  The eyebrow hairs thing made me laugh- which I really appreciate.  My mom will be flying in tomarrow (Lord willing- we're having an ice storm ::)).  I think I'm going to go take that bath.  I'll go post on the prayer thread.  I really feel like I did get a hug.

Many blessings to you!

Offline Mommyof4

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #15 on: May 11, 2008, 09:13:46 AM »
Okay, Baby #4 is one week old. I'm taking my placenta pills, lots of EPO, Pulsatilla. Anymore ideas for treating PPD??? Already on an anti-depressant and Dr and I don't want to change anything so soon after delivery because I'm still just riding the wave (s!) of hormones. :'( Things could be better.
Lots of prayer, tried singing praise/hymns songs to myself when feeding baby but really having a time remembering any other Amazing Grace!
Anything you can throw out here for me would be great!
Lindsey
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Offline mykidsmom

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Re: Could this be PPD, derpession, or just me feeling sorry for myself?
« Reply #16 on: May 11, 2008, 12:48:31 PM »
Okay, Baby #4 is one week old. I'm taking my placenta pills, lots of EPO, Pulsatilla. Anymore ideas for treating PPD??? Already on an anti-depressant and Dr and I don't want to change anything so soon after delivery because I'm still just riding the wave (s!) of hormones. :'( Things could be better.
Lots of prayer, tried singing praise/hymns songs to myself when feeding baby but really having a time remembering any other Amazing Grace!
Anything you can throw out here for me would be great!
Lindsey

Lindsey,

I think you need to distinguish between PPD and normal stress emotions due to all that's going on.  When I had PPD I couldn't play, talk to, or have any emotion towards my baby at all.  I could feed her and change her but that was it.  I had no feelings for her whatsoever. 

You have a lot going on right now and your hormones are still really adjusting to having a baby.  Could the emotions be stress related vs. PPD?  For me, that changes how I handle things.  If it's PPD, I'd say get someone in to help you daily for awhile until it passes.  A high school girl from the church, a single friend or a married friend with no children.  Just someone who can help ease the burden of caring for a newborn along with other children and give you some time to rest each day.  When I had PPD (it was bad) my sister came over everyday after work to "play" with my dd and she also taught my husband how to play with our dd.  I truthfully just sat there and stared at them most of the time.  But I'm sure stuff was going in watching them.  After she'd leave my hub would take over for awhile so I could take a soothing bath, or whatever.  I don't know what I would have done if I'd had other children.  I think it would have been overwhelming.  So, see if you can get some daily help for 2-3hrs a day for a few weeks. 

If this is stress related, find someone you can talk to confidentially.  A pastor, a trusted lady friend, pastor's wife, etc.  Usually with stress related stuff, just talking about it will help it go away.  That's probably a defining difference too between PPD and stress related emotions.  PPD is truly more physical because of hormones.

I suppose either way, it would be helpful if you could get some help 2-3hrs a day so you can rest during that time or just talk to them.  I think lots of PPD is avoidable if momma gets enough sleep - which isn't happening right now because you have a newborn and other children to care for. 

I'm sorry you're struggling.  It's very hard to get out of but you can.  I wonder if using lavendar or peppermint oil daily would be a help?  I use them in a bath or just a quick smell and it seems to help. 

Hang in there.  Praying comfort for you.

patti
For I know whom I have believed and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I've committed unto him against that day.