Author Topic: All About Birth Control  (Read 217195 times)

Offline Bobbie

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All About Birth Control
« on: April 05, 2006, 05:53:00 AM »
Hi all -

I am a widowed mom of a four year old boy and am getting married this summer and need to look into birth control options.  I am trying to stay neutral about having more children and want to leave it in God's hands but honestly I'm not sure I would like to have more and even if I did I don't want them immediately after marriage.  My husband to be is open to children or not but also feels to wait would be better.  We are praying about whether birth control is right for us and if so what kind.  I feel uneasy about birth control pills - I am trying to eat/live organically - naturally so birth control pills seems very unnatural.  As do other contraceptives.  I guess I am just looking for more natural methods of family planning and maybe even any scriptural guidance around family planning.  Is it using wisdom to plan or is it a lack of faith?  (I know thats probably a more subjective question then objective!)

Offline petrimama

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #1 on: April 05, 2006, 06:36:40 AM »
I'm so glad you brought this up!  My husband and I are on #4 and we are thinking about taking a break after this one because I am starting to feel my limits.  We still haven't found our solution, but we have sure ruled out a bunch, so I can't wait to hear if there is anything out there I haven't heard about yet.  Two things worth sharing:  Natural Family Planning (AKA the Rhythm Method) is very effective for "regular" women, and it's free.  Also, please be aware that there is a HUGE difference between birth control and contraception.  Many doctors and herbalists (except, maybe the Christian ones) neglect to tell their patients this and it can be very emotionally painful to find out too late.  Please consider that when looking into your options.  ~L

Offline ForeverGirl

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #2 on: April 05, 2006, 08:45:20 AM »
Hi ladies,
I was wondering when this touchy topic would come up!  ::)

We do have a planning method that is working, but we are still in testing phase  :D  It is called Neem oil.

My thoughts:
We wanted to make sure there was no chance of killing a fertilized egg. In other words, we wanted to prevent conception, not destroy it. So - neem as a vaginal cream didn't seem right, as it is apparently "abortive." However, from what have read, it appears that when the man takes neem orally, his sperm don't develop "strong enough" to pierce the egg. So conception never takes place.

Neem (read the articles) is used to cure sexually transmitted diseases, vaginal infections, malaria, etc... it has no known negative side effects. It has been used for hundreds (possibly thousands) of years as a folk medicine in India.

We want to have as many children as we can without cheating any of the already existing kids out of attention, training, etc... so timing is a good thing, in our opinion. Two years in between seems like time for me to get physically recovered, and the youngest to become a "kid."

So we've been trying the Neem, taken orally by the man - for over a year now. There have been no negative side-effects, and no change in libido.

We have also kept to the timing method though, obstaining during ovulation as much as we can tell (sometimes I'm not totally sure???). There is a really great booklet about timing that was made for educating people in third world countries. It's called Love & Fertility by Mercedes Arzu Wilson. The website is http://www.familyplanning.net  I believe this is what Petrimama was referring to???
Family Planning Method worked for the space (two years) between our first two children. The third child was a surprise because I didn't know I had started ovulating. Thanks to Supermom, the third PG was just great, anyway!
We began the neem oil after the third child was born. She is now 19 months old. I've had some severe liver/gallbladder problems due to Malaria in the past, and so we are waiting a little longer this time to make sure I'm all cleaned out and ready for #4.

We intend to put the Neem to the test in a year or so, to see if it works like they say it does.

There is so little research done (at least in America) on Neem as a contraceptive, I can't honestly recommend it, or even tell you what works - I just don't know.

I love kids - and I love the perfect timing and preparation for each precious one.

Rebekah

http://www.positivehealth.com/permit/articles/Herbal/thorn48.htm (neem as an herb)

http://www.sisterzeus.com/neem.html (neem as a contraceptive)

"Lots of research has been done in India in regards to neem and its contraceptive effects. It seems to have several contraceptive applications, as spermacide and an oral contraceptive for men, and two other options which would only be available through qualified medical research personal at this time. Neem provides men with an alternative oral contraceptive option, Neem Leaf tablets.
Research conducted on 20 married soldiers from the Indian Army over the course of one year showed that a daily oral dose of several drops of neem seed oil placed in gelatin capsules prevented pregnancy in each of the wives during the period of the study. The effect took 6 weeks to become 100% effective. The effects were reversed within 6 weeks after subjects discontinued taking the capsules. During the study, none of the men experienced any negative side effects and retained their normal capabilities and desires. (Vietmeyer, 1992). Neem is currently being used in India for contraceptive purposes for both men (orally) and women (as a spermacide). Currently, I personally don't know any one taking neem for contraceptive uses."
( This excerpt came from the sisterzeus.com site )
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Offline Bobbie

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #3 on: April 05, 2006, 09:16:29 AM »
Thank you both!  Since my initial posting I had looked online and found the website above and will download the book Love & Fertility.  I also found a website http://ccli.org/ that has a more indepth course on Natural Family Planning - tracking signs and taking temps.  Thanks for the tip on Neem - I will look into it more.  My future hubby just said last night, "isn't there something I could take orally?"  And I sort of chuckled inside thinking that was crazy.....but of course as usual he was on to something  ;)

Bobbie

Offline Tanya in TX

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #4 on: April 05, 2006, 09:28:49 AM »
I wanted to respond to this post because I totally understand your feelings, AND those several others mentioned---being at your limit, feeling overwhelmed, wanting to maintain good health between pregnancies.....all VALID concerns!

One book I LOVE LOVE LOVE for learning about reading your own body's signals is "Taking Charge of Your Fertility", by Toni Weschler. It is about $25, I think, and you can find it at Amazon or lots of other places. I first got it at the library before I decided I had to have my own as a resource!  It is a fantastic resource on how God made our bodies to function; the author is a femininist, but she seems to be very 'pro' life and 'pro' pregnancy.  It is for those wanting to conceive, or those wanting to avoid it without chemical intervention.  I cannot recommend it highly enough!  She also has software available so you can chart all your temps, cervical fluids, etc on your computer, and print out specific info, etc. It is very cool!

Another resource I highly recommend for the spiritual aspect to this question is Nancy Campbell's book "Be Fruitful and Multiply".  It is a wonderful resource for what the Bible says on this topic, and really opened our eyes to some things!  You can find this book through the Above Rubies website, or also from the Vision Forum website, as well as the usual places to order books used, etc.

Hope this helps!  Just some additional food for thought!

Offline Charis

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #5 on: April 05, 2006, 10:05:40 AM »
Hey ya'll. I was just sitting down to ask this same question when I saw the post.  :D I have found a device that I was wondering if any one has used before. My husband has reached his limit for now with our five. The device  is called Lady-comp. It requires you to take your temp every morning and by that it can tell when you are fertile. I will put the link in this post. I'm planning to try it because I am allergic to BC and both me and my husband don't think we ought to do anything permanent.

http://naturalbirthcontrol.com/index.php
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Offline Helen

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #6 on: April 06, 2006, 01:31:01 PM »
wow the neem thing could be exciting, I was on the pill for the first 6 months after we were married, and I was miserable , I didnt have low libido I had NO libido, I was sick , nausuas all the time, I finally quit taking it and then after found out some stuff about it that I would not take it at all anymore, but I have tried everything, and I am sick of dealing with it so much, hubby is in charge of birth control right now, and ofcourse that  works, I would be so glad for a natural BC, where do i get the neem for hubby to take?

Offline mamasboys

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #7 on: April 07, 2006, 04:40:19 AM »
My husband and I actually took a class for Natural Family Planning at a Catholic Church when we were first married.   It's amazing how comfortable you can get talking about 'mucous' with complete strangers!  :D
NFP is tracking your fertile signs, taking your temperature and charting all your signs and abstaining (or in our case using a condom) during your fertile time. 
This worked just fine until I got lazy tracking my signs.  Thus, Joshua.  Another midnight interlude gave us William  8)  Don't get me wrong, I loved the surprise of finding out we were pregnant but I also liked planning our third and am getting really excited about the fourth one on the way....heh! 
I hope I'm not giving you the impression that NFP doesn't work, you just have to be very diligent about tracking your signs and then it's basically foolproof!  I got the audio tape from Focus on the Family by Mercedes Arzu Wilson and it was very good.  At the time we were adamant about not conceiving so we were a little nervous.  We've basically relied on condoms for the past couple of years but as that didn't even work this last time....
Well, I guess what I'm getting as is this:  God is the author of life.  I think we all have a responsibility to plan our families as well as space our children but at the same time, God tends to win out in the end.  And I'm thrilled that He does.  A few days ago I was crying because we were having another one and now I am leaping for joy (thank you for those who have been praying for me!) that God has chosen to bless us yet again.
Now I'll start the debate:  I would be interested in any thoughts on having hubby 'snipped'.  We've talked about this in the past and just don't know if doing something permanent is not trusting God or if it is a responsible thing to do if we feel like we are finished having any more children.  We've researched the possible link between prostate cancer and vasectomies and have basically come to the conclusion that there is little to no link between the two.
Any thoughts??

Offline ForeverGirl

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #8 on: April 07, 2006, 07:27:34 AM »
wow the neem thing could be exciting, I was on the pill for the first 6 months after we were married, and I was miserable , I didnt have low libido I had NO libido, I was sick , nausuas all the time, I finally quit taking it and then after found out some stuff about it that I would not take it at all anymore, but I have tried everything, and I am sick of dealing with it so much, hubby is in charge of birth control right now, and ofcourse that  works, I would be so glad for a natural BC, where do i get the neem for hubby to take?


This is the oil we buy. My hubby puts several drops in a capsule, tops it off with a few drops of water, closes the capsule, and takes it with water each night. It stinks and tastes a little like very strong oregano, so you want to make sure to get the drops IN the capsule  :P

I've never heard of anyone else (in America) doing this... so we are pioneers in experimenting with this herb. Just beware of that!

http://www.banyan-botanicals.com/prodinfo.asp?number=3313&variation=&aitem=14&mitem=23
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Offline Gabriel Anast

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #9 on: April 07, 2006, 06:09:17 PM »
Actually, we may just have found a better source as they have a couple very interesting products: OrganixSouth.com, and I have come across a lot of information on the subject. I will post it in a new thread as I get the chance.

--gabe

Offline lewisquiverfull

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #10 on: April 08, 2006, 03:35:28 AM »
This is great, my first son was not planned, he just happened, then I got on bc for a few months, then my first daughter came along. After my second daughter, I was still very young and didn't know I could make my own disicions I got an IUD when my lovely dr suggested it. BAD mistake. I had it for 3 years and my husband decided that we needed to look into something natural. Well, we took the natural family planning classes just like mamasboys. We loved the classes, and learned alot. We are not Catholic, but they invited us in anyway. We got a book in the class called The Art of Natural Family Planning by Kippley. Excellent book. It gives all the information to do the planning, and also chapters on miscarriage, fertility after pregnancy, and many other things. Well, after doing that for 2 more babies, my husband suggested we "give it to God" completely. I am 26 and God has blessed us very well in the fertility field. That means there could be 15 more babies before I am completely finished. Uh... Well, my faith has definitely been put on a growth spurt. I don' t really know how long we will go "free" to God, and I would probably feel guilty if I did do something, but I still have reservations in the back of my mind on WHAT are we going to do??? I would love a great answer on this too!! Also, another book I came upon is called A Full Quiver by Rick and Jan Hess.

Offline TruthSeeker

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #11 on: April 08, 2006, 06:58:09 PM »
Hubby and I have also "given it to God".  We have a 3 year old and an 8 month old so far.  I have a 19 year old and 16 year old from previous marriage.  I would like to have as many as the Lord will give me, but I'm already 39 years old.  Then I have the whole "advanced maternal age" thing to think about.  You know, Down Syndrome, etc.  I believe all children are a gift from God.  I love big families.  What a blessing!  If you have 15 more children than you have 15 more chances to raise warriors for Christ.  Imagine what 15 more warriors can do for the Kingdom! 

Offline Youthful One

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #12 on: April 08, 2006, 09:06:31 PM »
I started reading this thread with just the first post a few days ago, and didn't get a chance to respond until now - WOW!  I'm so glad I waited so I could see some of these other great posts!

Hubby and I also have 'given it to God'.  I have long been aware that GOD plans each child.  He obviously allows us a bit of 'control', but ultimately - it's always God's choice.  I have proof of this in both directions.

Unfortunately, I gave God many opportunities to bless me with child prior to marriage - prior to my giving my life to God.  I was young, foolish and careless, and not once got pregnant.  (direction #1)

When I was engaged to my hubby, I got on BC (the pill), but got pregnant despite it as soon as we were married. (direction #2)   Hubby and I both hated the pill with it's ill effects.  So we intended to use family planning, as I have a regular cycle.  But, baby boy #2 came before my cycle reappeared after baby boy #1!

We then discovered a great help for family planning: ovulation calendar (for the computer). 
Here's the website: www.ovulation-calendar.com
It not only helps us NOT conceive, it helped us to conceive, as my story continues:

We used ovulation calendar and didn't conceive for awhile (whew! my longest break yet), and then we decided we'd really like to try for a girl.  Using the timing suggestions of ovulation calendar, we attempted to conceive for about 3 months, with no luck. (direction #1, again)  We took a break (so I wouldn't be HUGE with baby as a bridesmaid in a wedding), and tried again 6 months later.  We conceived right away (first try).  AND YES, IT'S A GIRL!  (It sure appears that the timing thing worked to get a girl- it may have- but I just tell people that God liked our idea.) ;)

Now, we have proven that the ovulation calendar worked to NOT conceive and also to conceive.  But wait...

We continued to use ovulation calendar as FP help with great success - until my daughter was 14 months, and SURPRISE!  Somehow, we conceived completely out of timing.  (direction #2, again)  I've gone over the details many times, and it doesn't add up.  GOD wanted our next boy, and THAT was the time He wanted him.  It took me a long time to reconcile that one with God, as I hate being pregnant and I was more sick than ever with that pregnancy.

We still use ovulation calendar.  We still enjoy it and it works well for us, when we pay attention to it (hence the current 'surprise' growing in my belly). :D

But again, I must say, ultimately it appears to me it is GOD's choice for timing.

Have we considered more 'permanent' options? 
Hubby? -NEVER!  Me? - only wishing hubby would when I was surprised with #4 ;D

Oh, and about the vasectomy - I know they've improved over the years, but a couple in their 50's in my church had a vasectomy over 10 years ago and just had a baby last year.  It baffled the doctors.  God's still in control.
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Offline healthybratt

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #13 on: April 09, 2006, 01:52:19 PM »
Now I'll start the debate:  I would be interested in any thoughts on having hubby 'snipped'.  We've talked about this in the past and just don't know if doing something permanent is not trusting God or if it is a responsible thing to do if we feel like we are finished having any more children.  We've researched the possible link between prostate cancer and vasectomies and have basically come to the conclusion that there is little to no link between the two.
Any thoughts??

My husband and I decided that my third pregnancy was too hard on my old, tired body (mostly hubby looking out for me) and decided that one of us was going to get "snipped".  Most research supports it's safer and less invasive for men than women, but...my story is 3 kids - 3 C-sections and since C-sections tend to be ...mmmmm... a tad bit invasive, I got nominated to be the "snipee".  I've had no real complications that I'm aware of.  I think my first few menstrual cycles were difficult, but this was probably due to the past 10 years taking oral contraceptives(which I would NEVER recommend for so many reasons) in between kids 1,2 and 3.

I guess in my case, leaving it up to God, was leaving it up to hubby.  He ultimately decided this one for me.  I do sometimes wish I could have more babies, but...the 3 I have are so full of variety, life and challenges.  I think I have all I can handle for now.   :P
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Offline advancewithcourage

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #14 on: April 12, 2006, 01:15:00 PM »
I am currently in the 3rd mo. of my 9th pregnancy and my hubby is planning on getting snipped. We have gotten some criticism for this but I am certain my hubby has my best interests in mind due to my continual health problems. I had pulmonary blood clot, CFIDS, celiac disease and chonic digestive problems. I have had two children with major birth defects (one deceased) and two second trimester miscarraiges.

At one time, we wanted to have as many children as possible and my health just continues to go downhill at times and rarely improves despite eating high quality food, avoiding all junk foods, juicing etc. Hubby does not want to raise his children alone and feels it would be very irresponsible to continue to impregnate me.

We have tried ovulation  method and I am pregnant again. I had no preovulatory mucus signs and ovulated on day 9 of my cycle. I have been experiencing a renewal of previously overcome health issues since becoming pregnant. I am thankful for this little blessing in my womb and I love him/her already, but I agree with my husband that it is time to do somethng permanent since nothing short of abstinence seems to be effective for me. He just does not feel like my tired and inching toward 40 bod can take it anymore. 

So, I say all this to say that we must be careful to allow our husbands to wisely make these decisions for us and not resist them. Trusting God to lead through them. Also, we must not judge others when they do choose permanent options. And we must not judge those who choose to have very large families. God calls different families to different things.

My 1st child died shortly after birth and I was so determined to have all the children God would give me after that. But God has chosen that my lot in life should be different and shoud include some health issues that I have struggled to overcome despite my best efforts at nutrition and natural healing.

My goal is to be the best mom I can to my 6 children and be alive (Lord willing) to see each of them grow up to serve the Lord wholeheartedly.

BTW, the neem oil sounds fascinating. I don't think we would have the courage to try it at this point, but I think it may be a great option for so many of us out there.

Offline 4myhoonie

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #15 on: April 13, 2006, 03:29:58 AM »
hi Advance, it was so good to read your story.  i have had some of the same emotions and feelings as you.  my hubby has been suggesting getting snipped for years (along with all of our parents/relatives and perfect strangers!)  he has been concerned also about my health problems, though they are not as serious as some of yours.  though he doesn't want to do it if i'm not ready.  i don't know why i just have this almost insatiable urge for babies.  my emotions and hormones are not fun for the first few months after the birth, mostly because of the stress of having very fussy babies and my own digestive problems.  my friend Laurie (who i think has 15 children, just recently added one more) is a distributor for GNLD products and may be able to help you regain your health more rapidly after your pregnancy or even stay healthy during the pregnancy.  i thought i would suggest it because she has helped a lot of people with some of the problems you mentioned.  i know my digestive problems (food allergies) have gotten worse after each pregnancy of the last 4.  anyway i have an article i could email you if you are interested and put you in touch with her.  she is very nice and no pressure, just thought it might help.  i hope and pray you have a healthy pregnancy.  don't know if you have read the posts on it, but it might do you good to try Supermom! (just another option) ;)
« Last Edit: April 13, 2006, 12:02:34 PM by fivewittletids »
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Offline bizymum

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #16 on: April 13, 2006, 06:31:14 AM »
My husband has pretty much made the same decision.  I'm 2 1/2 along in my 5th pregancy and the moment we found out he started talking about making a dr appt.  However, we are not against having more children, he just doesn't want me pregnant again (after this).  I've got health issues as well.  So we've already started talking about adoption, which is something we had talked about before we were married, but have been so busy having babies since then that we hadn't actually done it.  We're praying for God's clear direction on timing and so forth.  But that is definately an option for those who would want more children.

Offline advancewithcourage

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #17 on: April 13, 2006, 10:49:35 AM »
Hello fivewittletids,
Yes, I think it is best to avoid legalism on these issues and for each husband to make the decision in his families best interests. I must say that my current pregnancy is draining me beyond all that I could have imagined. I just don't remember being so tired before in my other pregnancies. When I was pregnant with number 5 my dad actually accused my husband of killing me! Can you imagine that! I was in the throes of CFIDS at the time though.

I would be interested in looking at the products your friiend has. Website? I am not sure how to go about getting my e-mail address to you. Could the moderators get it to you? I give my permission for them to do so. I would not want to post it here online. I would be interested in talking with you since we have similar family sizes and also deal with food alllergies and digestive issues. Perhaps we can share what we have learned and help one another.

Offline healthybratt

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #18 on: April 13, 2006, 12:35:28 PM »
I am not sure how to go about getting my e-mail address to you. Could the moderators get it to you? I give my permission for them to do so. I would not want to post it here online. I would be interested in talking with you since we have similar family sizes and also deal with food alllergies and digestive issues. Perhaps we can share what we have learned and help one another.

Check this thread.
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Offline Bethany

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #19 on: April 19, 2006, 01:28:50 PM »
I don't know if anyone knows the answer, but I've had a question about neem. The information I read indicated it worked by disabling the sperm and thereby inhibiting it from reaching the ovum. My question is, what if the sperm is "disabled," yet does end up reaching an ovum. Is there an increased risk of birth defects, or is it an "all or nothing" situation? If any more of you end up using neem, I would love to hear about your results. I am a student midwife, and would love to have a safe, effective, convenient, 100% non-abortifacient method of contraception to recommend.

Offline ForeverGirl

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #20 on: April 19, 2006, 07:16:14 PM »
We had the same question, but could find no recorded occurance of this happening.

 I haven't heard of anyone in the US doing research on neem as a contraceptive. It has been used for centuries in India, and none of the research we've read has linked birth defects/problems with the use of neem as a contraceptive. But, as you said, it is still a question that should be clearly answered one way or another. I'd love to talk to a doctor from India who has more experience and research in this subject.

We have been using neem as a contraceptive for over a year now.
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Offline petrimama

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #21 on: April 20, 2006, 04:16:48 AM »
I happen to know an internist from India.  I haven't spoken to him in years (he is the father of a friend from high school) but he lives down the street from my mom.  I know he is one of the dying breed of internests who still delivers babies, so he may have some info on this or be able to steer us in the right direction.  Risk of birth defects or possible miscarriage were my immediate concerns, too, but since I'm not in need of BC right now I never bothered to look into it.  I'll let you know IF I turn anything up.   ~L

Offline Kristin_19_78

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #22 on: April 25, 2006, 03:01:28 PM »
My husband and I are about to have number three and he says we're done. We discussed BC and permanent options, and after much deliberation he agreed to get snipped. I hate BC pills! No desire! And I'm not the slightest bit interested in any other options for women. My 28 year old girlfriend was just told by her Dr.. three weeks ago that she is pre-menopausal, probably bc she got her tubes tied! Uh!  :'( I said,"Did you know that was one of the side-effects?" and she said "yes"  I say  NO THANK YOU!)
So I thought hubby and I had made the right decision, until I spoke to my midwife. She and her husband had three children before his vasectomy. Then they chose to get a reversal and are now pregnant with their 6th! She told me how a man's chances of developing prostate cancer increases dramatically after getting snipped and that out of the three other men in her family that have had the procedure done, those statistics are apparently VERY accurate. Only 3 years after her uncle had it done, he was going in for radiation. And secondly, among her friends whose husbands have had it done, they complain that their husbands have lost interest. In my opinion, I think it is more mental than physical for a man, but what do I know? I think many men may feel less manly.
I'm just glad we didn't go through with it already. We're going to try the neem oil and I'm going to track my cycles when they return...It just seems like when ever we mess with God's creation, we mess things up. I would hate to become pregnant again after my husband has expressed his desire not to, but we have talked about the risks and no longer feel it is worth it. I'm going to do some more research  on the subject, I just wanted to share that info bc so often when comparing the female procedure to the male procedure...all we hear is how much easier it is for the man. "A quick office procedure, one stitch, snip snip, no biggy" but we don't hear about the down side.
Whatever you do, pray on it and may you be blessed!

Offline natural

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #23 on: May 10, 2006, 01:39:42 PM »
"NFP is tracking your fertile signs, taking your temperature and charting all your signs and abstaining (or in our case using a condom) during your fertile time."  mamasboys

Wow We were told by our NFP instructor, that condoms, jellies, etc. were NOT natural and therefore by using them we were no longer using Natural Family Planning. This made sense to me.

We decided to use the Natural Family Planning Method three years ago after the birth of our 3rd son. A Catholic affiliated woman gave meetings at the hospital. I took classes several times and found that the beginning was difficult to get ourselves "trained". It required many absitant days but it truly taught us self control. Now it is so free. The communication level between us is wonderful. And the days we can use are so much enjoyable and fulfilling because we had to wait. I have always been dead-on regular so maybe that is why it has been so successful for us. BUT I also am VERY diligent in my charting everynight and that helps too. It all depends on how much you do or don't want to have kids, but you have to make up your mind BEFORE the "heat of the moment"...Suddenly, at times another child just doesn't seem like such a bad idea :o  oops :-[

--Sister Sandra
« Last Edit: May 10, 2006, 01:43:24 PM by natural »
4 yo Maciah: Mamma I am scared the wind is howling.
Me: Go to sleep Jesus will protect you.
4 yo Maciah: (stretching his chin to chest) But, but I can't see Jesus my head can't reach into my heart.

Offline BlessedWith4

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #24 on: May 10, 2006, 01:57:46 PM »
I do believe that I agree with Sandra...It seems as though Natural Family Planning is about as natural as you can get! :D When me and Corey first got married, I was on BC pills (my then-OB put me on BC pills when I was 16 because of ruptured cysts and irregular periods I was having).! It did regulate my cycles and help with the ovarian cysts, but made me feel awful. I also got pregnant and had a miscarriage in those first early months after getting married, and I always felt that those BC pills were to blame. I will never get over the guilt I carry with that. Needless to say, I threw out the pills and declared to never use them again...and we relied heavily on condoms. Then I started reading about how condoms can cause different types of cancers, so that made me nervous about those, and I began to try to learn more about NFP. This is something that women have been doing for YEARS as far as checking your CM, etc. This is what we did in the 4 years between our two sons, so it seemed to work very well for us.

I use a website called Fertility Friend, and you can use it to aid conception or to help prevent it in the first place (by watching your body signs, etc.). It's free to join up, so I totally recommend checking it out.

Offline Maria/NHM

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #25 on: May 10, 2006, 02:10:40 PM »
Then I started reading about how condoms can cause different types of cancer

I've never heard that. Do you happen to remember where you go your information?
« Last Edit: March 29, 2008, 11:40:35 AM by Ella »
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Offline BlessedWith4

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #26 on: May 10, 2006, 02:14:06 PM »
Then I started reading about how condoms can cause different types of cancer

I've never heard that. Do you happen to remember where you go your information?

Maria

Oh, good question! Let's see...it was a few years ago when I was reading that. I'll try to find that out for you! :)

Offline petrimama

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #27 on: May 10, 2006, 02:29:32 PM »
Wow We were told by our NFP instructor, that condoms, jellies, etc. were NOT natural and therefore by using them we were no longer using Natural Family Planning. This made sense to me.
Quote

  Many people prefer to call Natural Family Planning the "Rhythm Method" because then it does not rule out using artificial means when the cycle does not permit "natural" intercourse.  I understand your points about waiting making the joining sweeter, and if you and your husband agree that going totally natural is best for your marriage, then I congratulate you on finding a solution to a very trying dilemma.  (I await the day when we come to such a happy solution!)
  However, many would feel deprived if sex were off limits for at least 1/3 of every month and this feeling of deprivation could lead to temptation.  (1Cr 7:5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.)  Especially considering that this day in age many travel frequently for work, people dress in less than modest fashion, etc., or simply one or both spouses is not enthusiastic about the limits,  I could understand why many would prefer to use a combo method.
   Being that the woman you dealt with was Catholic, I believe there was likely a religious  reason behind her statement that natural means no intervention.  I spent years in Catholic church and school, including a Catholic version of sex education classes as a teen.  Keep in mind, this was 7 years ago, so things may have changed, but at that time we were taught that to do anything to either a man or woman's body to prevent pregnancy or birth was sinful.  (Chemical, barrier & abortion methods were all included.)  However, for Catholics, abstinence, even within the confines of marriage is always acceptable because there is nothing unnatural about not having sex.  (I guess sometimes that's true, but not always! ;))  For this reason the Catholic Church is one of the biggest promotors of natural family planning and the biggest educator on it's prooven effectiveness.  However, obviously, the education they provide does tend to follow the concept that no intervention should be used.
  I hope that made some sense and shed some light on how different people can be using methods that often go by the same name in very different ways.  (Both very effectively, too!)                         ~Layla

Offline mishy

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #28 on: May 10, 2006, 02:43:15 PM »
I agree with you Layla.  I bought the NFP manual before my hubby and I married and we used it effectively but with condoms during the fertile times.  The non-condom approach is a Catholic belief. 
If you are using the NFP method, after doing for a year or less (if you are regular) you won't even need to take your temp.  My days were consistent for when I was fertile.  So if anyone out there is not yet married, you can start 6 mos before and learn your schedule.  There are quite a few days in there that you are possibly fertile, so abstinence wasn't in my husbands best interest!!!  ;)
Just made sure your quiverfull is full of arrows that are straight, true, honest, sharp.... and not just a "full quiver"
 :)


Offline healthyinOhio

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Re: All About Birth Control
« Reply #29 on: May 10, 2006, 03:04:36 PM »
This is a subject that I know too well about: VASECTOMIES.  A word from myself and my husband,  DON'T DON'T AND DON'T DO IT!!!!!  It was such a horror to find out all of the awful complications that arise from the surgery itself.  Increased prostate cancer, increase arteriosclerosis(heart attacks),  damage to the vas deferens, body's immune system attacks itself for having to fight and attack residual sperm all the time.
My husband wanted the surgery.  I didn't.  I cried and prayed, but he got it done.  He had post vasectomy pain for a long time.  He admits, he just didn't trust God to provide for more.  I prayed for three years that God would change his heart and in November of last year he had his reversal.  God does answer prayer.  Only, the surgery didn't take and there is a build up of scar tissue that is blocking the sperm, so the doctor says we will need another surgery if we want more kids. :-[
Talk about devastating!  We are still paying on the loan for the first one and now they want to do another one!
A couple of good books about birth control and letting God plan your family are:  Does birth control pill cause abortions?  by Randy Alcorn(by the way, it does)  and A full Quiver by Rick and Jan Hess.
We were told by men in the church that the Bible does not say biblically whether a man or woman should "get fixed".  We were wrong.  Well, I am now aloud to say, my husband was wrong!   :)
If you have to cause hubby says so, then do it and pray like crazy!  God answered my prayer, he will answer yours.
It just breaks my heart to think of people fixing themselves, when I would do anything to have another baby, and can't.  I am not judging anyone, just stop and think before you do a drastic thing.
Natural family planning and spacing is good!  There are a lot of already good reccomended books and herbs on that.  Good luck and I hope I have helped one person to decide not on a vasectomy.
With love,'